Illustration by Khara Scott-Bey from Big Topics at Midnight

How can we ensure that wise feminine voices and ways of being are heard and honored in business, politics, culture and religion?

How can we move beyond the exclusivity and damage of patriarchy to a balance of feminine and masculine that leads to thriving partnerships?

I came of age during the women’s movement in the 1960s and 1970s. Things have changed since then. I am grateful that many doors have opened.

Yet I want more. During those years, women were invited to participate in the current system—the patriarchal system—as long as we played by the old rules.

I’m looking for something new.

I have no interest in bashing men, ignoring left-brain thinking or smashing all hierarchy. Instead, I want an alternative to the unbalanced, masculine-centered culture that has long dominated our institutions, values and behavior. Patriarchy has hurt men and boys as well as women and girls. Looking ahead for my children and grandchildren, I want to help build a world where feminine and masculine ways are both equally honored and used. To do this, we’ll need new rules, paradigms and ways of being.

Painting by Khara Scott-Bey

Learning to notice how I’ve internalized the values and perspective of the established, masculine-centered paradigm is humbling. While working for balance in the world around me, I discovered that I must also tend to my own inner change.

Some of my own inner work is serious, pondering.  But some of it is downright fun. One day Hectate showed up in my imagination, a combination of the Goddess Hecate and my wise inner guide with an attitude the size of Texas. Who says transformation has to be hard?

I have just scratched the surface of the topic of gender. I was born in a female body, have always felt like a woman and am sexually attracted to men. It would be easy for me to assume that those feelings are true for or exclusive to all women. They aren't. My experience is narrow. I have much to learn.

I want to live life as a dance where the feminine and the masculine and everything that’s part of being human—falling down and getting up again, ambiguities and certainties, thinking and intuition, work and play—are part of the process.

I continue to dive deeper into gender on my Big Topics Blog:

Black Women’s Leadership: My (White woman’s) leadership
Led by Women, the March Goes On
Rising Up with a Little Kick Ass Help

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